SEARCHING FOR LOVE

The sky is basked in grey and pouring heavily, hitting hard on mother earth...
You and I are out in the rain, not together but apart, searching high and low in the street, moving through the heavy curtains of raindrops
Situated at different ends of the streets, not just us but our thoughts too...
Worried Stricken vs Moments of Happiness...
We both were searching for different goals...
I was enjoying the moment of being alone, pouring out buckets of thoughts as I inhaled in the familiar scent of green grass and raindrops...thinking not of you for once but about what is ahead tomorrow
Breaking free from bondages, I was indulging in a moment of pleasure through a cone, licking away troubles and worries...
Back in the warmth of our home and was told that you were out there searching for love...
A strong gush of emotions washed over me, I was strongly touched by your acts..
The love that you were searching is none other but...
ME

A Barren Woman’s Heart

Children are a blessing from GOD... I yearn to receive this blessing .
Looking at friends around me receiving this special blessing makes me feel so barren.
To some, children are nothing but nuisance...
To some, children are the best companion one can have....
Once, someone told me that being a parent means that
GOD is entrusting a little life into our hand.
It’s our responsibilities as a parent to nurture these little life...
LORD... am I not reliable enough to be entrusted with a little life...
How I yearn to hold a little me in my arm...
Mummy will love you whole-heartedly and together explore the amazement of this world.
I’m looking forward to meet you soon..... one day...

My most precious baby

I AM BACK!!!

Being missing for so long, I know that some of you miss me dearly, at least I know there's Mag and Min missing me. Keke... I know that my blog is really dusty by now. Just to update a bit of my current life situation, 1st of all, I am currently jobless, not working...life's kind of out of control for me right now, but yet it's in good hands, GOD's hands. I'm in a bit of a sticky situation right now, pardon me for not being able to share in details, but for all those who treat me as a dear old friend, don't worry about me, ok. I'm going on strong still, coz GOD is my refuge and rock. Actully I have a rejoicing news to share with all of you. After 3 long years of hiding away from my everloving Heavenly Father, I am finally back in His big strong yet gentle arms. GOD, I really don't know how to express my remorseful self to you, I feel so ashamed of my wrong doings and only remember to run back to YOU the 1st minute trouble hits home, yet FATHER you embrace me wtih wide open arms and tell me that everything is gonna be ok. Looking back at the past 3 years, it have been dark and lonely time, life seem to be normal on the surface, but the inner part in me is so so hollow. I been asking myself for the past 1 week, how can I allow myself to come this far without turning back to see where GOD is. I feel so stupidly remorseful, but truly indeed I'm going back with a heart of worship. I AM BACK!!! I feel just like the prodigial son, never am I going to leave again. This I promise....Amen.

COUNTING DOWN TO REUNION

Days really pass by so fast.... another 6 more days my hubby will be back. When I look back on my last entry, I was still feeling so miserable and can't see the end of the lonely days, but now I can finally catch a glimpse of it. YEAH!!!!Just another 6 more days, 159 hours more, 9540 minutes more and 572400 seconds more and I will....be able to see my dear. I'm so looking forward to see my dear when he's back, next month, we will be able to go on a rather long holiday together...First to Afarmosa then to Bangkok, whew... finally a good break away from reality and able to spend quality time together with him. I'll take good shots and share with everyone in my next entry...Hope that you'll will have a good break during the year end and able to spend quality time with your love ones.

MIN, MAG & ME

I just finish reading my 2 best gal's blog, and I decided to do another entry, it's so ironic that the 3 of us have love and hate issues with e guys in our life, dad and partner. Dear Mag, dun worry! Your dad will soon get better, with you now as his supporter and life fighter, he will sure be healthy till old age!!! Dear Min, soon you will be able to start building your own love nest with your supreb great ability! Somehow, we 3 have came this far in our life together and apart... looking back at the time when we 3 were just students, young and full of hope for life. The path that we each took is different but yet I never feel that we are lost from each other. Mag, you were asking what are you great at? U konw what, YOU ARE GREAT AT BEING BOTH MIN AND MINE'S FREN, A FREN THAT IS EVEN CLOSER THAN FAMILY!!! Somewhere we may fall down and feel hurt, sometimes we may hate the people around us and wish that they will leave us alone, but one day we will huddle close to each other and laugh at each other's life events. Won't we....
I LOVE YOU BOTH, MAG AND MIN WITH ALL MY HEART!!!
Stay strong and awaits the day when we become old ladies and reminisce the days of our life together over a cup of hot tea and cookies?









1

SICK AND ALONE

What a pathetic sunday for me, I feel sick to my stomach, can't swallow my lunch... As I lay on bed, I can't help feeling miserable and feel like bursting out. On the 15th day that my dear have left for Australia, I feel that time is creeping pass slower n slower. Have you ever experience being hospitalised and put on drip, the feeling of e liquid slowly creeping through your arm, slow and painful. I remember that 8 years ago when my dear went to Australia too for detachment, I was down with lung infection and need to be hospitalised, I went through the kind of torment while laying in the hospital bed missing him. Today at this moment, I'm experiencing the same pain ago. I called and asked him...."Do you know that when you are in love deeply with someone and can't see him or feel him, the kind of feeling is so so painful". Alas his answer to me was rather off. Should I say that his love for me is not as deep as mine to him, or that I'm not as mature as he is...
I really miss him so much.... but no one can understand my pain, everyone just say that time will pass very fast, but no one can understand that in my shoe, I really yearn that someone out there can understand how I feel and hug me and cry together as I await the day he is back. A friend of mine told me this, when you are really sad, your tears can't flow out, I now can know affirm what she said is true!
I just feel so lonely and sad now.
Dear Dear, I miss u so much...

A TRIBUTE TO MY BEST FRIENDS

My intention of today's blog content was about my baby nephew, Adriel.
But when i saw the msg left by Mag on my cbox, i had a sudden rush of emotions overcome me. I missed u badly too, dear Mag... I miss u on days when
I had a bad day at work
I had a bad session with Isaac
I am shopping
I sit in the cafe having coffee
I am watching movie
I stroll in the bookshop
I feel so fexed abt home
I AM BAKING
I AM OUT WITH AUNT MIN MIN

How i wish that the 3 of us ( Miz Chew, u and me) can always hang out together, at times it feel strange that we are so close and yet we are physically apart! My birthday wish this year was that I hope we 3 can go on a holiday together...(ever since that weekend) It's been a desire of mine that we 3 can really make this wish come true...

I thank GOD that HE kept Huimin by my side.... Dear Min Min, we may not meet up everyday, but I must tell u that u meant a great deal to me too. I may blown off a lot of our appointments ( not that I dun feel guilty about it, I DO!!!). But I do look forward to meet u each time. (dun forget our photography session on ur bday's eve, how about spicy steamboat for lunch after that, keke...).

I guess u'll must surely agree with me that FRIENDS are precious creatures on this earth. They are the ones that do crazy things with you, stay by you through hard times, ensure that u dun end up with the wrong life partners. I really count my blessings for each and every friends that I have... including Brigitte and Eva with their partner, Goofy, Anthony and many many more...

So u guys out there!!! remember to give your dear frens a bear hug when u next see time, it's not easy to come across a great friend everyday!!! Will I get a bear hug too???
THANK YOU FOR BEING MY FRIEND!!!